Rummy wants to stay the full
Bush term — he has much to do.
Undeterred by the consequences
of too few troops, too little armor
in Iraq, he wants a leaner military.
Facts don’t daunt a dedicated
warrior, who hikes five miles a day
around the Pentagon, thwarting
reporters’ probing questions.
Reduced enlistments make smaller
numbers easy, but the equipment
he wants isn’t on others’ wish [...]

A day after the Senate passed
the Real ID act, hundreds of
fake badges from 35 government
agencies were confiscated.
This is a major risk. The badges
were so realistic even officials
wouldn’t know they weren’t real.
Citizens would be confused too.
Before we create 50 Real IDs,
we should consider: will they be
easier to verify than metal badges.
If not, leave well enough alone.

Republicans usually do well with names,
but they dropped the ball on CAFTA.
The Central American Free Trade Agreement
becomes less popular by the day.
First, It sounds too much like NAFTA,
the treaty that helped turn many Democrats
against such deals – they finally realized
free trade seems to help everyone but us.
Ballooning imports, declining exports,
unemployment, and unhappy sugar growers
made the [...]

American Conservative Union
will pay tribute to Tom DeLay
with a $250 a plate dinner
May 12, at the Capital Hilton.
Here is a suggested invocation:
We gather to honor the Hammer
and pray he stays out of the slammer.

The New York Times predicts the
Senate showdown on judges starts soon.
I hope they’re right, this is a fight
I don’t think Republicans can win.
If a few of them see the light,
vote against the religious right,
Frist becomes grist for the recycle mill.
If they don’t, Democrats refuse consent,
say: “withdraw that judge
or we won’t budge.�
That could stall donors’ laws [...]

Since they didn’t have enough to do,
(they’re fighting his programs left and right)
Bush told governors to choose which national
forests should be opened to roads, drilling,
mining, logging, or other productivity.
If they don’t decide in 18 months, Forest Service
will. If they do, the feds can say “yes� or “no.�
(Imagine Bush delegating such power.)
Outraged environmentalists, and Democrats
with presidential [...]

Representative Bill Thomas
surprised House leaders
by promising Christmas in June.
His Ways and Means committee
will write legislation to “save�
Social Security sure to outflank
the bill sought by the Senate Finance
committee and the White House.
Thomas, who never lost a floor vote,
proposes a long list of sweeteners:
help troubled industries with huge
pension liabilities, protect insurance
companies from unfair competition,
raise limits on [...]

Tom DeLay’s carefully crafted
corral collapsed. The House restored
the decree removing any leader
indicted for a crime, then repealed
new rules permitting any probe
to be blocked. Good friends added
to the ethics committee recused
themselves from investigating Tom.
Finding himself in worse shape than
last term, when he was censured three
times, the Leader is floating a new
idea: travel rules are so confusing,
all [...]

We toppled a terrible tyranny,
and produced pandemonium.
We held an election. Impressive
numbers voted for people who
have failed to form a government.
It is time for President Bush
to abandon his aggressive attack
on Social Security and devote
sixty stops in sixty days
to getting us out of Iraq.

Congress wants to turn
driver’s licenses into national
ID cards, and has a long list
of requirements for the states.
Social security numbers and
addresses are easy to get,
but how does anyone born
here verify citizenship?
Birth certificates are photo
copies, obtained by mail, with
no picture and a barely legible
state seal. What do they prove?
DMV officials hopefully will
stay with what they know,
and issue [...]

Republicans rush to take over
Public Broadcasting. The chairman
hired a search firm to recruit a
former official of the Republican
Party to be the new President.
Concerned that “Now with Bill
Moyers� had too many liberal guests,
he gave Paul Gigot a new show
featuring the Wall Street Journal’s
editorial staff – no liberals there.
PBS programmers will be under
pressure, but they can restore
objectivity [...]

Words are important to Republicans, but
not permanent. Estate tax became death tax.
Private accounts turned into personal
accounts practically in mid-speech.
They called ending the filibuster on
appointments their nuclear option,
now they say constitutional option.
(’cause some pronounce it nuculer?)
Democrats usually refuse to adopt the
new words, but they should agree to use
them all if the GOP would agree to change
Religious [...]

After 60 days of trying to convince us
diverting taxes to private accounts
would solve the Social Security crisis,
Bush tackles high gasoline prices.
He admits he can’t do anything about
them right now, but insists Congress
must pass his energy bill. It promotes
nuclear power and liquefied natural gas.
That won’t help the cost of driving, but its
tax breaks for oil companies [...]